Adult Swim’s Robot Unicorn Attack Heavy Metal is all your childhood (or adulthood, as the case may be) fantasies wrapped into a game for your iPhone. Note: I don’t have an iPhone, but I will play Robot Unicorn Attack Heavy Metal on your iPhone if you have one. The game is simple: You’re a robot…

We here at Decibel try to stay apolitical due to the fact that all stripes of metalheads should be welcomed into the fold to get their fucking faces torn to shreds by brutality. But a keen-eyed reader, W. Jaczkowski, sent us this screenshot with some un-apolitical words for the current mother of a girl who…

What do Atari Teenage Riot and Blut Aus Nord have in common? Uh, hard to tell, but Sailors With Wax Wings and Pyramids mastermind R. Loren knows the connection and would probably wax scholastically — existential attributes reinforced by repetition — about it. Turns out when R. Loren isn’t busy with bridging shoegaze/post-punk and black/doom…

It’s contest time, motherfuckers (no offense). Lesbian, the Seattle psych-metal maelstrom who write the kind of music Satan himself smokes weed to, have released their newest record, Stratospheria Cubensis (Important). It is an incredible leap from their Power Hor debut, both sonically technically, while still pushing their singular sound. Just look what our own Leah…

Ed Note: I don’t have the time (and perhaps not even the physical ability) to grow a Brian Wilson beard, as per my NLCS bet with Matt Harvey (plus, like you’re really gonna even remember this bet in the five weeks it would take to grow it), so just enjoy my concession speech. “In your…

If you’ve been following us here on the Deciblog for the last few months, you know that exactly every two weeks we post a flyer for something called Heavy Tuesday. We’re still not really sure what it is, but J. Bennett keeps insisting that it’s occasionally awesome. As far as we can tell, it’s this…

By Road Chief Chris Coyle (Red Fang) What’s happened the first week of tour? Hmm… Man, nothing all that exciting. Kinda like every other tour going out there. You know, after the first show we swerved to miss a deer and rolled the van twice in the middle of I-5, walked away with only a…

Gene Simmons, an old prick who’s subsisted for the last thirty six years on piles of cash, gross sex and arrogance, thinks people on the internet are analogous to laser-pointing fans at his shows. He assumes with a few belches from his makeup-covered, distended belly, he can scare people into following his commands and be…

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAfpq6EPKck (Addendum: Mr. Nick Green actually presented this video to Deciblog viewers about a year ago, but we thought “Hey, we can write it up a whole lot better than that guy.” Then we didn’t.) This video isn’t good. No one’s saying it is. But how are we going to let a clip where someone…

Greetings, unwashed Philadelphians. Short of a midweek rainout, there won’t be a Phillies game to command your undivided attention this Friday; hell, we may even know the victor of this high-stakes wager by then. So, take a break from pondering the complexities of the double switch, hop on the Blue Line and do irreparable auditory…

It’s no secret that Decibel writers spend lots of time looking at pictures of cats on the internets. The December 2009 issue featured the Cutest Kittehs in Metal story. We’re disciples of I Can Has Cheezburger and Cute Overload. When I stumbled upon this picture of a 4-month-old European Burmese kitten at some ridiculous cat…

From the crackerjack crime-fighting outfit at the Idaho District Attorney’s office comes word, via press release, of a great & glorious victory: A Hayden psychosocial rehabilitation worker was sentenced today for Medicaid Provider Fraud, Attorney General Lawrence Wasden said. First District Judge John P. Luster sentenced Lindsay A. Nelson, 26, to 30 days in jail,…

If that picture doesn’t make you want to roundhouse a 13-year-old’s teeth in during a wall of death, we feel sorry for you. Just kidding. Ehnahre are a pretty stellar DM/free jazz/esoterica hybrid from the perpetually psycho Crucial Blast envelope-pushers. Featuring members of dB favorite Kayo Dot, Taming the Cannibals is a late contender for…

Scion Rock Fest 2010: Black Anvil Interview from Scion A/V on Vimeo. Black Anvil may’ve formed out of the ashes of punk outfit Kill Your Idols three short years ago, but today they’re a black/thrash powerhouse. New album, Triumvirate, is merely the beginning of the New Yorkers’ future reign as kings of U.S. aggression. Recognizing…

The first time I went to CMJ was, I dunno, eight years ago when I lived in Seattle. It coincided with Halloween, as usual, and having little petty cash or patience for costuming, I decided to take the super-innovative “Dawn of the Dead zombie” approach. The only problem was, instead of mixing my $2.99 Duane…

I’ve never seen a woman made of 100% guns and skank but check out the piece of meat Revolver has laid out on the slab for their new “Hottest Chicks” issue. Known for their substantive music reporting and progressive views on gender equality, the editors have again decided to beg you to jerk off on…

Brooklyn bruisers Hull were kind of enough to give us permission to stream the entire Viking Funeral EP. Actually, Viking Funeral isn’t so much an EP as it’s is an epically long (16 minutes and 51 seconds) song. EPs are classified as, according to Wikipedia not the RIAA or Billboard, “a musical recording which contains…

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PL5S5_16t8E Over 1.5 million homeless children in the U.S.A. What are we doing??? This is what the Los Angeles rap-rock band Imperial Stars asks on their website directly below the image of a sports car flying through space. These complete and utter sacks of shit caused a traffic jam in L.A. yesterday by blocking three…

This one’s for all our Los Angelean mutants: If you don’t have your heart set on shoving it away too long to snuff the rooster (i.e. the BlackDiamondSkye boner-rock fiesta at Gibson Amphitheatre), blast on over to Footsies on N. Figueroa tonight for this Decibel-icious grind-tastic DJ night. The flier says it all, but I’ll…

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-uakxkjYMDI In our continuing look at hall of fame music videos, today we have In This Moment with their song “Fetish Cam Whore and Gay Wolverine Kiss.” Also called “The Promise,” the video is the perfect example of, to quote Youtube user sevenfoldrules, “an awesome duet between scream users.” Indeed. Taking place in a poorly…

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UES1eNy9qo Right about now, all your favorite (and most-hated!) Decibel writers are hustling to get their year-end lists together for the Big Man In Charge. But I’d like to take an opportunity to share with you my favorite video of the year. It eclipses “genre,” so don’t go bitching about how it’s not metal. Blow me—this…

Grab a bucket of fried chicken and potato salad. And don’t forget a blanket and some boxed wine. It’s Heavy Metal Picnic time. Jeff Krulik and John Heyn, the fellas behind Heavy Metal Parking Lot, worked their magic with footage taken by Rudy Childs at a 1985 hesher-fest billed as Full Moon Jamboree in Bumfuck,…

Rainy days and Tuesdays always get us down here at the Deciblog HQ. Why? Who the hell knows?! Lack of sleep, realizing we’ve run out of Rice Milk after we’ve already poured our cereal, the sole of our right shoe is delaminating, or we just can’t seem to write a catchy headline are all good…

Rumors are that Anal Cunt’s Seth Putnam is releasing a “celebrity” sex tape in support of his upcoming cock rock album on PATAC Records. While not much is known if Putnam is truly going the Warrant route or is merely taking a piss (predicted) with his as-yet-untitled cock rock debut, photos have surfaced showing the…

So after the lukewarm reception the Triple Decker record received last week, here’s another innovative way to present vinyl- with your own shitty ashes. And Vinyly will produce up to 30 records that contain your earthly remains, each one with 24 minutes of whatever audio and artwork you think will somehow represent your life, which…

Shameless Self-Promotion Alert: As you can perhaps infer from the tastefully designed flyer above, Repulsion mastermind Scott Carlson and I are starting what promises to be a sufficiently killer DJ night at Footsie’s in Los Angeles (2640 N. Figueroa, 90065), mere blocks from Decibel‘s L.A. Bureau. Naturally, we will be spinning only the finest in…

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBgMk4X9MzA If you’ve already seen the Super Mario Castle Theme covered by Death Metal band Nylithia, you don’t have to brag. Many in the metal world have already enjoyed the Canadian band crushing it old school while Mario does some sort of jump squat headbang I haven’t seen pulled off since the ’80s. Now it’s…

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